Being Nice...It Does Matter

What happens when you are extra nice to service people?

You get extra mints on your pillow and your room has an extra fresh smell

You get hot towels when you are swimming

You get consistent service and asking if everything is okay

You get a VIP room for a standard price

You get an extra appetizer you didn’t order or complimentary desert

 

You have the bell hop walk you out to the street to get the right taxi

You get the hot food when it comes out instead of picking at leftovers

You get an extra hand with your luggage

You are respected and listened to more because the attention you give THEM

 

Some examples: 

                         

                        

La Isla Foundation

Of all the wonderful NGOs that I come across, I realize that I definitely do not mention them enough on this blog. La Isla Foundation is one that truly touched my heart because it works with a population that may be forgotten about without their assistance.  It's mission is to help advocate rights for those that are have Chronic Kidney Disease(CKD) and are out of work. The population they work with is a small village called Chichigalpa just outside of Leon.  

Older age males and females engage in strenuous labor in hot climates leading to sickness. CKD is diagnosed and the access to proper treatment is near impossible.  These people can not afford dialysis and kidney transplants. There is also no way to slow down the process of CKD.  It leaves human beings just waiting around for death. In the last ten years, 46 percent of deaths were caused by CKD in Chichi(www.laislafoundation.org)
Unfortunately, this is happening throughout Central America, Sri Lanka, and India killing thousands of people each year.  People are leaving their families behind dying too young for a disease that can be treated. 

You can be part of the solution by donating today. 

https://laislafoundation.org/

Spanish Vulnerability

Sometimes my Spanish decides to take a vacation. I'm not sure where it's going whether it be Costa Rica or Panama or maybe it's just going to the beach.  It's embarrassing when I am scrambling for words and people are looking at me strangely.  Most people tell me, "You have such great Spanish," which I give credit to my expression and ease of flow. In my opinion, language is not my strength, but picking up on non-verbal expressions, gestures, and their pronunciation is what makes me communicate better. 

When these cloudy language days arrive, I start with the broken Spanish and then I look up things in my handy Iphone Spanish-English dictionary, which does not require a Wifi connection.  There are moments with this Iphone where I think, "Wow, this thing really is helpful."
Although, the local person is not concerned with the Iphone or the dictionary, there interest is in you.

You are not the American that is just trying to get by with some Spanglish.  

You are not the American who would never look in a Spanish dictionary because people speak English.  

You are not the person who disrespects the language. 

You are the person who pulls out your phone, says excuse me, and looks up a word or phrase.  
You say thank you for their patience and apologize again for your incompetence. 

 The amount of happy faces that I have seen pulling out this Spanish dictionary. People are so happy when you are trying to learn their language, but they are happiest with the beauty of vulnerability.
You are sitting there in front of them completely alone and vulnerable-in their culture-in their city- in front of their eyes. They love that you are just trying to learn, you are trying to improve, and you are just trying to communicate with their language.

There are days that we are going to be great and there are going to be imperfect days.  People respect you when you are trying and just showing some human vulnerability.  You're not a perfect, smart American, but you are someone trying to learn just like everyone else-no matter the color, the race, the language, and the country. 

Next time your Spanish, your new learning language takes a vacation. Pull out that dictionary or ask a local.  The sun will shine again and you will have a better language day. Those difficult days will come, but......

Instead of feeling embarrassed let yourself feel human. 

PRIS 

And They Got Cake

The last days are always hectic, but they usually turn out to be amazing with God's blessing. I awoke early to ensure I had all my materials together in my backpack.  I stopped by the office to meet with Mrs. Francis to print a few things.  She asked me what I had planned for the day and stood so proud in front of me.





If I ever doubt people's belief in me, I can always think back to certain people. Mrs. Francis being one of many people.
From our conversations to watching my conversations with others or witnessing my time with the kids-her whole face radiated in appreciation and respect towards me.. She believed in me. The smile that a proud parent would have, the smile of confirmation, the smile I was doing something right, the smile of satisfaction in my efforts and performance. But most importantly, the smile saying, "Thanks for being you." 
 

Overtime, I had saved my sympathy cries up until this exact moment. It was the last day, which meant more food than just a snack.  As I told her about my plans, I made it clear that I wanted the day to be special and I had to reward the good behavior that was present.  I was using my cuteness and charm to drive home the importance of "special." Of course her response involved not having time or enough notice, which was an understandable fact. Unfortunately, I did not ask her earlier because I just decided to not ask anymore after previous attempts. 


I don't believe in begging for something, but I do believe in using my personality and character to get what I want. Just demonstrating such a care for these kids and showing heart helped me get it.


"It would be so nice if we could just have one of those amazing cakes that the kitchen makes cut up into small pieces." Pris


"Or whatever fruit you have left in the kitchen, we could make a fruit salad." Pris


"Okay, okay Priscilla. How about I see what I can get and I stop by when you finish up?" Mrs. Francis


"Okay, sounds great." Priscilla





I hopped on the bike and went on my way.  I couldn't wait to see all the kids from the week as I had told them their behavior is based off rewards and they receive big rewards on Friday, which was TRUE. We had balloons, goodie bags, gift certificates, and games they requested. It was our day to review what we learned, have fun, and celebrate. 

Unfortunately, when I arrived that morning there was a clear shortage of children present. One by one kids started coming in and their faces looked more and more unfamiliar. This is always my saddest moment when I do not get to have closure with my kids, youth, adults- so sad for me and for them. The girls told me that the kids all went to Belize city for the weekend and they stay until Monday. 
 

Okay so that accounts for a lot of people, but where are my older boys? There is no way they would miss the last day of camp. 
 

"We'll there was kind of a fight last night." Darrah
 

"What kind of fight?" Pris 
 

"Well there was a gang bang." Darrah
 

"So they are not coming."Pris
 

"Some will come and some are grounded."

Only a couple of my older boys came and many of the younger ones were present, but   

Parents just say, "Hey drop your kids off at the camp for the day when they have not been there all week." 

Super annoying and rewards were going to kids who do not even deserve them, but that's just the nature of this work. 



The kids were loving the activities especially the scavenger hunt. The best part was them finding the last item at the same time. One younger boy was riding fast on his bike and the older girl was running towards me with her braids swinging in the air.  They were both coming from opposite sides of the neighborhood and here I stood at a bridge in the middle.  The bridge joined them together despite their differences.  The girl ended up winning and she said she never won anything. They were thrilled and I was thrilled for them-lots of high fives and encouraging each other to congratulate their team member on a positive contribution. 



It was great that even the new kids were participating. It just goes to show how positive energy, teamwork, support, and caring can encourage participation. Well, it's so much more, but that's experience that you build overtime. 



Another Arts and Crafts activities involved Arts and Crafts making cross necklaces.  The boys finished their map of Mahogany Heights and they were so proud.  They had so many disagreements, but they were encouraged to stick together and they did....they did. 

Throughout our activities kids were giving me big hugs, smiles, and thanking me for coming to work with them.  It was so interesting how respectful these kids were to me as it was a part of their community to respect adults.  They were always helpers and not always following the rules, not always listening perfectly, but they never will. They are kids and they make mistakes-it is up to us to respect them, give them space, and count their steps of positive change whether almost invisible or wonderful. PRIS

It was time for our snacks. It turns out we had chips and one of our volunteers bought cookies. 


This volunteer came in Day 1 with no smile on her face and looked like she was just trying to do a good deed.  As camp went by, she warmed up to me, she opened up, she danced, she laughed, and then she made cookies.  She spent over 2 hours using a unconventional stove and she made them.  That's what happens when you become a part of a "good feeling." It spreads like wildfire and you want to help, participate, contribute, and be present. 



Since I had made purchases for the program. I was specifically told to not purchase anything and I followed the request. I was clearly doing enough as I was crazy busy the whole time.  Sometimes I wonder if I took a test and I would account for 2 people productivity.  The "new" kids on the last day(ironic statement) were running around outside so I had to reign them inside. It was such a zoo as it usually is the last day. 


While serving the cookies, I looked up to see Mrs. Francis looking classy and beautiful.  She asked for some assistance to the car and I sent out our older helpers. A few moments later in they came with two trays.  I ran over to open one up and I opened it to see two big, chocolate cakes with vanilla icing....cut up into small pieces.
Oh the detail and how the how happy the kids were-I did not cry rather my heart was just filled with appreciation. 


On the last minute, she did this for me and for the kids-it was so special.  The kids all had a piece and a second piece. They stood around the cake staring at it and pushing to get another piece.


I told her, "Thank you." and "Thank you" and "Thank you." She knew how much it meant to me and for someone to care about that-that's beautiful. 



It was time for ending and we sang a song and handed out certificates. I had individuals motivational talks with the older kids and we had hugs galore. The volunteers were so kind in their words and their hard work in the camp. One is a teacher and the other has a daughter in the camp. It couldn't of happened without them.



The hardest part was the last walk through the neighborhood. It was a walk I took with Mrs. R as I was taking her to dinner. It almost didn't happen as we sat in her house I helped her start an email. We were waiting for her husband to come back so he could watch the kids. It was getting late, but he came in the nick of time.



We walked along the dirt road and our crazy taxi driver friend pulls up beside us.

"You girls aren't going to walk all the way over there, hop in."



And off we went to "Cheers" where everybody knows your name and their always glad you came

 

People can do so much when you just believe in them. I will continue to believe in people until my last day comes. PRIS

They Crave YOU

Sometimes Volunteers are completely unaware of how much they are craved. They are desired by those less fortunate who truly need their attention. Within their basic needs, there is a high need for acknowledgement and attention. There are so many people who are hungry for a simple exchange that can be done in just 15 minutes or less.  The elderly in my first organization craved attention- just a smile or short exchange could make their day. When I sat and had lunch with them, they were so thankful verbally and by expression.












With all the volunteers there on a daily basis not one person could go sit with them? 



In Guatemala, it is often the kids who get the benefits, assistance, and attention from volunteers.There is a respect for the elderly in the culture, but the NGOs are not focused on serving elderly rather adults take priority. All they can really provide is food to meet that need, but what about the acknowledgement of their being? They get lonely and often need a friend or just someone to sit with them.  



In Belize, the MH community is another population who is desiring that attention. The children and the youth especially crave someone to come and spend time with them. With Monkey Bay, they have so many volunteers coming in on a regular basis from the US, Europe, and even South America. Unfortunately, everything has its structure to follow with non-profits and there is a conflict in interest.





















Most kids don't have an interest in community projects with social work so you can't force them, but it's a shame that so many people come in and not one can just go play a game with them or read a story. If they could just take a walk over to the other side... They would see children who just want your time.  Children who want to get to know you and learn about where you are from. They are human beings, just like you, on the other side.  They are living in poverty, but receiving a financial donation is not what they need. .

Give your time and love tourists- not your photo shots and your wallets. They don't bite they are just humans....

At the end of they day they just Crave You.
 PRIS 

The Hardest Part

  

     

  

The Hardest part is not the work, but the hardest part is saying good bye. It's a short time you build connections, you make people feel good, you listen to them, you challenge them, you empower them, and then you leave. It's why organizations encourage you to volunteer for longer periods of time. Sometimes you can be "hurting" rather than "helping" a community when you come for such short time with no goals and just a strong desire to "help people." This is not enough to make an organization grow rather it's just temporary work to satisfy your own self rather than benefit the actual organization. 

As a clinical therapist for years, social worker, life coach- I am aware of the positives and negatives with working short term in an organization. With hard work and dedication to making a difference, there can also be amazing seeds planted for the community or even for new volunteers.

As a human being, I made the choice to make the most impact possible per organization.  With a short time of 2 weeks per organization in each country, I made a community and or clinical assessment on what needed to be done and I did it.  Instead of just "volunteering", I made a commitment to leave something permanent at each organization whether full behavioral reports, rewards systems, power point trainings, and full efforts with staff and clients working to my potential  . It was me leaving something useful for them rather than just playing with some kids and walking out the door like many volunteers.

With these short term connections, it becomes difficult to leave. When you are working with preschoolers and young children, it becomes even more difficult to leave. With the preschoolers, they don't always understand why I am leaving and they look at me funny. You get the questions, "Where are you going?" "Why are you leaving?" One student even said, "Can I come with you?" I joke that I will just take everyone with me and we will all take a big bus together and travel through Guatemala.  I will feed them fruit and lots of ice cream.  We will all be content with each others company not in need of another intellectual to give us their directives.  It's just a dream I mentioned and the teachers absolutely love this idea. There is no harm in a perfect dream.  

In reality, I have to leave to go to the next project, which was organized ahead of time. It's not an option to stay longer when I made a commitment to another NGO.  Organizations like Mayan Families with clients and a community who touch my heart-saying goodbye is the hardest part.  While the teacher did make an announcement, many children don't actually comprehend what is happening and leaving my favorite clients is difficult.  

In my case, the teacher made an announcement and many kids ran up to say Goodbye. My favorite client and my little learner, Angel, looked surprised to hear me leaving and he didn't look content. It made me sad to see his little brown eyes look like a puppy dog. Me encanta el!  This little munchkin was walking to the door waving his little hand. It continued to waive out the door as he was walking with his father. We just kept waiving at each other until distance was lost- difficult, but life keeps moving and more clients keep coming.

The teachers were so sweet and thankful saying I was the best of everyone in Mayan Families. It is so sweet that they recognize my work and my commitment to people-that's a wonderful connection.  It was truly a blessed experience and I would definitely consider visiting again and potentially working with the indigenous community. 

With beautiful communities comes people who carry your heart into a distance, which brings you closer to a better tomorrow .  -PRIS-