Some Start Young

Sometimes I meet these lovely women who are in their mid to late 30s with a big family ie 4 to 5 kids.  They are all grown up with the oldest one being in their teens-16 or 17.
It's a wonderful thing to start your family early, but I often wonder how they do it. Some started between 20 and 25
which is an average age and maybe a better way to start?

While it appears to be all about when you're ready, the realistic fact is that the longer you wait, the harder it may be to reproduce. If you have a child at 25, you will be 40 when they are 15. If you have a child at 35, you will be 50 when the child is 15. This is quite a difference, which makes me ponder how young  is too young? And how old is too old? 
 
We often judge those who irresponsibly have children very young. Those clients I have worked with who are pregnant at 12- this is clearly too young, but some people insist they are ready at 17 or 18.  Is it about maturity? The confidence in your love and relationship? The desire to reproduce?


Many older generations produced at younger ages and did not receive judgement rather it was the norm. It seeks like the early 20s are the time to have kids if you are in a committed, loving relationship and make that decision together.

 Being younger in your early 20s and late teens could bring you into the center of responsibility. It may aid in your growth process or it may lead you to continue your same lifestyle and not take care of the baby. It truly depends on your support, environment, dedication to being a mother, and the desire.


People make me feel like a proud parent.
When they follow through, When they listen.
When their eyes look at me to get my support, my acknowledgment, my praise.

These are my moments of being a parent. It is the same as having children learn how to ride a bike and you are right behind them clapping and smiling.

I love people so much. They are my absolute everything and they come through for me. With doubt comes moments of absolute wonder. When I do hold some doubt, God comes through with people.

Taxicab confessions

When you feel down, he sends Angels. It's just plain and simple when you have a deep relationship with God. 

Walking from the third police station back to the hostel to get my bag was only a few minutes. Of course I was thankful for this as I did not want to accept a ride from the police officer after I was trying to make a statement about the injustice. 

Arriving back to the hostel, my plan was to grab my bag and head directly to the airport. 4 hours early? No problem. I just wanted to go home for the first time on the trip. You experience problems and you seek comfort. 

Outside in front there was a guy sleeping in his cab, I banged at his window a few times(not very considerate, but business is business). He gives me a ride for $20, which is $10 less than the usual fare. Clearly he sensed my aggravation and he was the person to listen to it all. 

Talking to him felt like talking to an insightful therapist or psychologist. He had such insight into his own culture and the behaviors presented. He said some people are just completely ignorant while some people are nice-it really is case by case. While this whole good people and bad people thing is true, the cases proved themselves more than a few times- at least ten. This waitress at the restaurant who completely snubbed me and helped all the locals- this was real and happening in front of me. He did not confirm my belief that Panama is discriminatory against Americans or to specify- does not like female backpackers. 

As he kept listening and responding, I realized this was all coming from personal experience. He was a therapist on his job and in the car. This was his profession too listening to people's, problems, and stories. He comforted, gave reassurance, and was helpful. Everything he did for me worked. He calmed me down, listened, validated my opinions, and thoughts. All his quotes and life references, it all successfully worked. 

When I informed him that there was a show in USA called "Taxicab Confessions", he could not believe it.  It was his idea to go move to New York and start taping. Taxicab driver really are therapists. It's a space where many people open up about their life and feelings. People know they will never see this person again so why not let it all out? 

This taxi driver was also religious and quoted some scripture. He made me feel hopeful and be more optimistic about my interactions with the Panama culture. As we were driving in the airport, there was some Bryan Adams song playing. The lyrics matched exactly what he said, it wa s a total "aha" moment. 

              This was IT

It was the end of the trip and this man was sitting and reassuring me of the beauty of people. His whole mission the taxi ride was to make me happy.

Mission accomplished! 

Exception to the Rule

As a tourist, I have a tendency to be the exception to the rule in many scenarios whether on the bus, at a restaurant, in a hotel, on the beach, on a tour-the rules are a bit more flexible. It's not because I do something manipulative or bad, but it's mainly because I treat people with kindness, love, and respect.  I empathize with their job, talk about their life, identify with their feelings, learn about their family, and their daily routine.  I let them know that I am also a human rather than just a tourist. It is my goal to make them feel good and leave my presence feeling satisfied.

When you extend yourself to people, they naturally do the same in return, which leads some rules to break and exceptions to be made.  For example, everyone needs to sit in their assigned seat, but I end up switching my seat and sitting in the front.  The tourists stay on the bus while I use the driver's family home's personal bathroom. Beach privileges for towels and drinks. Room discounts and privileges. Coach buses have even dropped me off directly at my location. It's a fun relationship where I am making them laugh and smile. We share our food with each other and share our cultures with each other. I am fitting in as if I was a local or part of the staff. It makes my traveling so much more rewarding having this interaction. 

As for other tourists, they can also chime in with the laughs and enjoy the entertainment. They can be annoyed with  it and not understand it. On the whole, they don't mind and find my behavior funny. They usually want to talk to me and learn more about my travels. It attracts them when they see someone outside the normal travel box. Many travelers are comfortable in their safety zone, but there are others who want to interact with locals and learn from them. They just need a little push, a little motivation, or a person to show them "They don't bite, they are just like me and you." There is always an opportunity to speak, to learn, to listen, and to grow:)

Iphone and Travel

For many years, I watched all my friends strut around with their Iphones in and out of fashion events, parties, and nightclubs in New York and Los Angeles.  It was like the coolest thing to have and if you didn’t have one you were “Out.”

For years, I was “Out” and I refused to conform to the “Apple Iphone World.” For years, I was content with my Ipod shuffle that held 200 songs or so. It was not about having all the expensive gadgets to be in trend. When you have an Iphone, you are making a statement and I was not interested in making the statement.  It was my responsibility to sometimes send text messages or look something up with my friends Iphone. The touchscreen was actually hard for me to use and I didn’t understand how to properly use it-true fact. 

Often when traveling, I saw American’s and travelers with these Iphones. It looked convenient and like something that would be handy for information.

After 5 years of not having an Iphone, I conformed when returning from Morocco and received a Free Iphone 5.  I still did not want to get one when I came back, but it was Free.  It’s not a great excuse as values and morals trump materialism, but not in this case.  I hopped on board to the Iphone world and as I figured-it’s a point of no return.

There is no possible way to say that having an Iphone while traveling is not useful. It is extremely useful for me to write and connect to WIFI to communicate back home.  I am behind with technology as I just started using Whatsapp this year and was not even aware of how you could connect for free with the world.  It would have been great to use on my first trip and preferred over facebook, which I will not use anymore. 

Abroad, it’s not so cool to have one when you are a traveler because practically everyone does.  Although, it is still very cool for one person- the local.  The local who can’t afford one and the local who wants one so badly-it’s a reason for me to not have one. 

The biggest thing I do not like about having one is presenting in front of others.  When I use it for Notes constantly, I have it out and it is always on display.   It is very exciting to a local who sits and stares at it with such envy as if you had a thousand dollars sitting in your hand.  In some countries with the value of the Iphone, it is almost $1,000.  This part of having it is what makes me want to not have one.  The last thing I want to do is present materialism as flashy, cool importance.  That sends the wrong message and I have to provide clarity to children and adults. 

For example, a man singing a trumpet in the middle of the market stared at my phone and asked about if it records.  I told him that it does record, but it has limited space.  This is a Belizian man who is very poor and probably can’t afford to buy groceries for a full week. 

He says to me, “I’m going to get the newest version of that very soon.”

Pris: “Really? How much do you think a new one costs here.”

I don’t know, but I want it. 

Pris: Okay why do you want it?

To record video.

Pris: Don’t you think you could use something else to record? Something less affordable?

Yeah I could

Pris: What if you didn’t record and you just kept playing beautiful music for people? The Iphone holds no importance in your self-expression. If you really have a purpose for a video camera, then you can buy one second hand.  The only reason I have this phone is to voice record and write-that’s it. It’s not important, it’s just an electronic. 

Okay, that’s very nice. Thanks so much young lady. Thank you.

You’re welcome. God Bless and Take care.

These conversations happen frequently with locals who don´t have a smart phone, but they desire it so badly.  While it´s not important, the world of Apple makes it important. At the end of the day, our human values trump the phone because it holds greater importance to our being and growth. The Iphone will never outshine the interpersonal interaction-never, never, and never. 

Discrimination vs. Aggravation

When I came back from Colombia, I had six hours and one place to go...the police station. The thought did cross my mind, "Do I really have to stop there?" "Can't I just get some food and relax before my flight?"
Instead of following my gut feeling, I just decided to dive into more disrespect and attitude. The reason for my visit came from a small lost bag including a necklace, bracelet, and some headphones. It was lost or stolen near the small market in this area of town(not a great area), but close to the church.  Anything lost or stolen has to have documentation according to my travel insurance. So, I figured I could go inside and get a report and be finished with Panama law enforcement....no.   

Now when it comes to foreign cops, I am usually pretty good with talking to them.  This was the case when I arrived in the police station. There I was making my report-happy, smiling, and making jokes. The police officers were respectful, kind, and concerned-two men specifically.  They asked me each and every detail and I provided clear answers to the best of my knowledge. The cops were all their in some training and were eating food.  They offered me a box and we were sitting and eating together. 

A short man comes in named Manny. He is suddenly in love and starts making this inappropriate gestures and I am laughing it off.  Everyone is laughing it off. It's just funny as he bent down on his knee and asked me to marry him when he's already married. He offered me a ride to the airport and clearly I declined. 

His entertainment made me smile and forget about Panama men being arrogant and rude. Instead of helping out, he just left and said, "Good luck." 

When those two men were writing my report, I thought I would be out the door in five minutes. My acting debue was finished and I wanted to eat something and leave-that's it.  
These two guys tell me that this is a special case so I need to be taken to a different office. From the get go, it starts off bad with these two officers. They are confrontational with huge egos present in every inch of their body language. The current police officers said, "Don't worry these guys will take good care of you and get you what you need."  The four guys all waived goodbye and I stared out the window watching things slowly go downhill.  

When we arrived at the office with no documentation, the man asked me to repeat everything again.

"But the two men already wrote everything down." Pris

"And I just said Again." Officer


So that is what I did I went over all the details again and he told me I needed a police report.

Well that is why I went there to get a police report. Until he said, you have to go to another office. This is a total of two hours at this point.  Then in destination three it reached three hours. There is some priority for an American, but when they people behind the desk sees you are one-all time stops. 


Now, a new breeze was coming in my direction- a fresh female gust of wind. She was not happy to see me and she did not want to help me.

It did occur to me, "Do I really need to go through all this?
 Just leave and go to the airport!"

Sometimes it feels like I enjoy being a masochist pushing myself to the core to see how strong I can be.  
This lady was annoyed with my presence and asked me about the details of the incident. It takes her 15 minutes to get to the counter and then she is just standing there with no response to questions and completely rude. Standing next to two male cops, this her opportunity to prove her female authority in front of them.  When she asks for the date, I tell her it was seven days ago. She throws my sheet to the side, shakes her head and says, "That's not possible-it's too late."

I say, "But I just spent three hours to get a report and the guys at the original station took the report and accepted it.  She has her back turned to me at this point and I am becoming very upset with this behavior(this is the worst way to get to me) by not acknowledging me at all. 

This time I did not stay quiet and respectful, but I spoke up for myself. "You can not treat people like that just because you are trying to prove yourself." It's very sad that you have to act this way." I said nothing more and I stormed out feeling angry and disappointed. I put my trust into these people again and they completely wasted my time, really? 

In my opinion, it was possible, but she chose to exercise her authority with the "Princess American."  
This felt just like Morocco, which is again why I cried for the second time on my trip all over this Panama treatment. It was so uncalled for and unjust. They crossed the line from kind to ignorant and self centered.

There are other examples where I feel this discrimination from them as if they don't like Americans at all.
When I was at a restaurant in the airport, there was another incident where the waitress was ignoring me and serving all the locals. With this taste of discrimination, I thought about
what it feels like for a person of color or different ethnicity experiencing discrimination.

It's such an awful feeling when you are in a culture with such disregard and disrespect towards your being.  You feel like the outsider and oh what a feeling it is. It's like God gives me these experiences for growth.

Clearly I live in America in a diverse city where I hardly experience discrimination, but when abroad I learn about what it's like. Everything is a learning experience- everything. It's a set up by God to push my own limits to learn to the maximum to assist others better.

Of course these experiences may bring up different feelings like anger, disappointment, feeling annoyed, or exhausted. This is the normal range of feelings and

The Americans will tip and you don't even serve them-not cool and not okay.  
 

Don't Cry for Me Colombia

It was a sad day leaving Colombia and I was pushing my time to the maximum.

Seconds and minutes were passing and I was shopping or talking to someone or taking my sweet time at breakfast.  I said bye to all the staff as my usual routine. The front desk was the most difficult to leave and the breakfast staff-just adored them. The taxi had come on time as I was prepared to miss my flight. If I did, would it be so bad?  I guess staying at a fantastic hotel helps anyone's interpretation of a city, but this city is spectacular: great shopping, great nightlife , fun and good looking people, great energy, great dancing, excellent food. It's a country that I knew I would love in a continent that ranks in my heart as one of the best. It's a place to visit again and again and enjoy yourself and immerse in the culture.




So happy to make this trip for my 30th birthday.

Eating sushi, Peruvian food, and typical food for breakfast-I did not get a chance to eat at the pricey Mondongo's. It's basically a pricier version of local food you can have half price. The waiters I made friends with were waiting for me, but I just ran out of time. Literally I was going around the hotel saying bye to all the staff- making my usual runs. Going around so fast that I misplaced my Colombia gold leaf necklace I bought in the gift shop- quite expensive. I left on a positive note and was thankful for spending my 30th birthday in Medellin. 

God bless Medellin, Colombia! Te amo!!!

 

God bless Medellin, Colombia! Te amo!!!

 

And so the Story Goes...

My Viva Colombia flight left on time and was headed on a 45 minute flight back to Panama City. On the plane, I met a lovely Colombian couple who were traveling to Panama City for 5 days to stay at the Hardrock Hotel-what a coincidence.  We waited in the long customs ride and I sat there absolutely terrified with my two friends.

"What if they ask for my card again? "
"What if I say the wrong thing?"

My two buddies were reassuring me that "everything will be okay." It was difficult to believe after my first border crossing into Panama. Apparently, the border is very different from the airport. 
"Next. Hi, how long is your stay in Panama?"
"I have a flight this evening at 12."
"Do you have anything to declare?"
"No, I don't."
The whole time I am holding my rosary hoping they will let me through.
He says, "Okay, have a nice flight."

"Pheww I felt like a criminal who was bringing in some illegal package. This is how much anxiety I had after my traumatic border crossing. My friends were waiting for me and said, "I told you so."
The customs man was fair and nice-justice was received and retribution. Now, it was time to get a taxi to get to the center. The Israel guy, a super typical backpacker who smelled of alcohol, was headed with his girlfriend on a shuttle van. I talked to him a bit and told him to wait up. The shuttle took me back by the Don Bosco church where I had planned to make a stop......

Avocado Tantrum

Eating sushi, Peruvian food, and typical food for breakfast-I did not get a chance to eat at the pricey Mondongo's. It's basically a pricier version of local food you can have half price. The waiters I made friends with were waiting for me, but I just ran out of time. Literally I was going around the hotel saying bye to all the staff- making my usual runs. Going around so fast that I misplaced my Colombia gold leaf necklace I bought in the gift shop. It was $50....wonderful. I didn't know I lost it until sitting down on the plane.

Anyways, I was rushing out and so disappointed about not getting this Colombian avocado. I was talking to the taxi driver asking him to stop and he was concerned about my timing; I was concerned about an avocado.

 

Sharing my sob story with the candy guy, he gave me some advice....

 He looked at me with a serious expression as if this was top secret information.

"You go across the street, down the elevator to the ground floor, cross the street again, and turn right into the building.   There you will find a great local restaurant. It's a secret only staff know about."

He smiles with his cute 20 year old dimples. He knocks on my backpack and passes some free Colombian candy in my hand.

 

Off I run downstairs like a 10 year old searching for her dad. There I see a lunch lady style food counter with  a larger Colombian woman with a big smile. She kind of looks like a Figure from Botero's famous work. She dishes out everything I want, but she says they don't have the avocado. I frown and shake my head thinking, "This is probably the one restaurant without avocado.

She does have all the other main necessities, but I am just missing the avocado.

I walk to the front with a big frown.  When I smile, I can touch hearts. When I frown, I can make people feel very bad. The man behind the register hear my disappointment with no avocado. He says, "Quieres un aguacate?"

 

I said, "Si, si- Me encanta aguates de Colombia."

 

He says, "Hold on let me go check."

 

Looking at my watch, I am realizing that I am pushing my time trying to get my perfect last supper.

Just in time, he comes out with a huge, perfectly ripe avocado. "Is this okay? It's the only one we have?"

"Okay? It's perfect." Pris

 

Avocado tantrum over and Priscilla is again spoiled by beautiful people.

           Lovely, Lovely, Lovely,  Locals!

 

Missionary to Missionary

At last my friends have come along

My lonely days are over

And life is like a song

When I was on the cable car to the ‘looking over the slums, I was tuned out to the others inside. I was consumed in poverty. How does this happen where one side is so rich and the other is so poor? I sit and ponder these things while others talk about face book and what they want to eat for lunch. I can’t really focus on that when I am looking at what’s below me.

Fortunately, there was a long way to go and we ended up three different cable cars to get to the top. The third cable car entered into complete natural beauty and I could refocus myself.

For an icebreaker (yes therapists use icebreakers too), I asked the four in the car if they would like a picture.  It was all downhill from there as we immediately clicked. Oh come on Priscilla how do you just click with strangers? I make jokes to make them laugh and we get to know one another. 

By the time we were off the cable car at the top of this amazing forest, they asked me to join them.  They brought their “lunch” and I brought myself because I planned to buy food at the top. I found some nice chocolate covered strawberries (need those) and a whole bunch of meat (not very appetizing). 

On our way past the local food, there was a man selling a gooey white substance. It was suppose to be a dessert. My new friend walks over to buy one and hands it to me. While I love sugar, this is not something I want I try. I taste and it taste like something gooey  with coconut. "Mmm" I smile. I walked around with it having small bites and acting like I like it. 

This was a National Park with 

many trails, hikes, waterfalls, ziplining, kayaking, bird watching, and more. My focus was on the activity and not so much on the eating. The Colombians make me lose my appetite with those bodies (yikes).

We had such a wonderful time taking a long hike to the park where you can kayak and zipline. We stopped at a couple waterfalls and made  silly jokes.

Along the way, they were eating their lunch. I stopped to eat their “lunch.” They said they brought a picnic lunch. An average person would think sandwiches, cheeses, and some fruit. Their lunch consisted of cans of soda, Cheetos, mini brownies, chocolates, and something like fritos. They kept offering it to me and I was thinking, “How do you all eat this junk and stay skinny?” It’s a metabolism thing I just never quite understand.

Nevertheless, it was cute watching these adorable Colombians chomp on Cheetos and walk like turtles. 

The guy, Christian, was quite a guy. He shared with me his story that he was a missionary and he preaches all over. He recently finished a trip walking from Panama City to Colombia through the jungle. This was hard to believe, but his friends all confirmed it. This kid was amazing and intriguing to have such commitment to the Lord to walk through a jungle hundreds of miles-maybe 1,000? When he explained his reasoning it involved doing something greater than what is asked for by the Lord. It involved service and it involved spreading the message of the Lord-powerful.

 People do incredible things and they do them with God whether they are aware of this or not.  PRIS

 

This was interesting because it turns out they were all Christians and they met through the local church. Two girls and two boys in their early 20s and committed to Jesus-beautiful.

Instead of taking the cable cars back down, it was recommended to take the bus. Oh my goodness, I love the bus, but this was like zig zag and zig zag all the way down. It was completely nauseating and I needed a break.  They weren’t up for kayaking and ziplining because they wanted to catch the bus down. They had church to attend-wonderful Christian new friends yaay.

They left me all by myself to zipline and kayak-oh so sad. The ziplining was quick and just went right across the lake.







 


























The kayaking was a rather large boat with a paddle. This was not a kayak. It’s made for 2-4 people, but I wanted to give it a try with one person.  The guy said I could go and try and out since they were closing and he didn’t think I would be out long with 1 person and 1 paddle. 

Well, I even surprised myself and the Colombian family in the water. I started off switching off my rowing. Something I was doing was unsuccessful because I stayed in one place. This caused laughing from the people across from me. 

I decided to move my body forward and this help me have a better grip. Off I went into the sunset and around the bay area. People were still watching as I was switching sides at a crazy pace. My speed was pretty good for one paddle.  When I took a break, I stared out into the sky and trees, took a deep breath, inhaled the surrounding and the beautiful day with my nice Christian friends. This day happened with reason.

Over It

Priscilla is the type of person that when she is over something- she's over it. When her mind is set, it's set and it's just a point of no return.

When it comes to going out to bars and clubs, I'm over it and I have been over it for a few years. It's been a life closer to my core values which are avoidant of negative behaviors- not for family or friends, but for myself and my belief system. I am allowing myself to return to my 16 year old self caring about books, studying, friendships, learning, and ministry. It was a mind of purity that wanted to avoid negative things. It wasn't perfect, but focused on the core values that were important.

Clubs were never important until I let them become important. I focused on going to the best and most popular places, being VIP, and dressing in a new outfit each time. While I love fancy hotel restaurants, lounges, and bars- my attendance is not a common occurrence. I do enjoy beautiful ambiance in nice hotels, but clubs with drinking and hip hop music or some top 40 non-sense, there is not one drop of interest. I would rather be cooking, reading, writing, exploring art, out in nature, having a real conversation and connecting, or sleeping.

This sweet girl at my hotel asked me to go out again on Saturday, which was a full day for me staying out on the streets until 9:30pm and getting back to the hotel at 10:15 after finally finding my way. I guess this would what people do-go out, but I just wanted to lay low.  Also, I know what she meant with "go out."  It didn't mean upscale, it meant bars drinking beer and vodka/tonics-no thank you and no gracias. While I feel bad saying "No", the desire is just not there. I told her if she wanted to take a run, go hiking, eat some food, take a walk, check out an Art gallery,go swimming, go eat, picnic in the park-basically anything active outdoors I'm interested!

 Sorry girls for not being social, but Priscilla is just oh so over it. 

Shorter Por Favor

On Friday and Saturday night, these are the best nights to go out in Colombia. Of course, this is a standard for many countries, especially USA. This country was a little different though because this city defined "true parties." People start at 12am and they go out until 5am.  

When it came to going out, I planned to go with the receptionist(super nice and perfect English), but she had to work late.  This was fine because my only intention was to go out and people watch. Of course, I had interest in seeing some hot Colombian man-I am a woman and I am allowed to look. 

The main party area was in El Poblado about five minutes walk from my hotel. From my room, I could hear the bass.  While I had no desire to go out, I came to Colombia and it was a must to go see the nightlife.  The best part for me is people watching therefore I decided to take a stroll through the park and party area. It's full of amazing restaurants, lounges, roofs, fast food, sushi-everything you name it.  

          

            Waiting for food 

I thought if I found a good place I could check it out for an hour or two. Although, I was completely enjoying myself on the street. The high numbers of people on the street and the open patios where you could watch people dance. There are some underground incredible salsa places, but I felt like staying in the area. Taxis at night-no bueno.


With my magnetic gravitation to luxury, I had to check out this fancy hotel I had heard about. When I got there it reminded me of one of my favorite NY restaurants, it was gorgeous. There was only one guy ahead of me who went up through the elevator. The party was happening on the rooftop-my favorite place to be.  When I got dressed, I actually put on makeup, did my hair, work my black and flower jumper and gold wedges. I received a good amount of attention(did not expect much being in Colombia) so I thought I looked okay?
Apparently, I did not fit the part for this bouncer. 


"You're wearing pants."
"Yes, but this is a jumper with gold wedges."
"Still those are pants."
"Yes, but it's a nice jumper."


He was being quite respectful and didn't look me up and down with that horrible "rejected" look. He was just doing his job, which I understand.  I am standing a bit outside the door just glancing at a couple girls standing outside.
He points to this girl who is dressed in a black mini dress with everything exposed and 6 inch silver platforms.


"That's what you need to wear.  A short dress and platform shoes. The shorter the better."


While I mentioned these girls are beautiful, they don't always dress the part.  Many follow the expression, "the tighter, the better" and fortunately they can pull it off.  Their cleavage is exposed, their skirts are high, and platforms a must.  There is nothing I can really say to that other than, "Let it be."
This guy was serious about "looking a certain way." While I really wanted to go upstairs, I was not willing to look like that ever.  Not to mention that dress and those shoes are nowhere in my wardrobe. 


After this experience, it was disappointing, but I was not stuck on it. I walked around and talked with some locals, checked out a salsa place for 15 minutes and went home....

That party desire fuel is not running in Priscilla's engine.